Under our kitchen sink.
Sergeant Chip: “All right, troops! This little shin-dig just got a little more interesting. Pointing to a map of our kitchen. They’ve set traps here, here, and here. So lets give’em something to talk about.”
Private Cookie: “Permission to speak, sir?”
Sergeant Chip: “Yes.”
Private Cookie: “What exactly is the risk level of this assignment?”
Sergeant Chip: “Given that none of you are dim-witted enough to touch the bait they naïvely expect us to carry back to our colony, the risk is almost zero. That, however, is beside the point.”
Private Cocoa: “This assignment includes ant killer bait?? Awwesoooommeee!!!! This is totally cool, man!”
Sergeant Chip: “OK, if we’re all clear, let’s move out.”
The children’s tune “The Ants Go Marching One by One, Hurrah!” plays in the background as the company marches out. Scene switches to the kitchen where Elisabeth is pouring her morning coffee at 6:03am.
Elisabeth: “Ahh!”
Brenda, entering the house from her morning work-out: “I know. We’re being invaded by ants, but I know how to get rid of them. Just spray this Clorox Spray and drown them.”
Todd, dragging through the kitchen door just in time to hear Brenda’s remark: “What!!!! That will never work!!! The only way to get rid of them for good is to let them take the bait back to their colony."
Elisabeth: “Well, we can’t let them crawl around our kitchen!”
Sergeant Chip (who has been intently listening to this conversation): “Hear that, boys? The sweet, sweet sound of dissention. They’ll spend enough time arguing for us to complete this devil of an assignment.”
Private Cookie: “Whew. That’s a relief! I was starting to sweat there for a minute. Oh wait, I wasn’t sweating. The weird girl dripped her coffee creamer on me.”
Private Cocoa: “I’m not worried. This is the best!!”
A few moments later they have completed their fiendish mission and begin to march out.
Private Cocoa, skipping along behind the others and accidentally trailing his tail through the poison: “See, this is like, totally, no big deal!”
Thus, the over-zealous compatriot proved to be the downfall of his company.
Other than this rather distressing experience, we’ve been plugging along as usual. Georgetown is holding their annual Model United Nations conference this weekend, so I spent last night at the airport greeting the Israeli, Jewish delegates. Apparently, the Arabs didn’t want to greet the Jews, so they had to get the “Christian, American girl” to do it.
Emily heads off to Malaysia in a few hours. We’re placing bets on how many leeches she’ll have to ward off during the trip. No, just kidding. I wouldn’t wish a leech on anyone, especially not in the middle of the Malaysian rainforest! I would, however, give anything to see Emily in a Malaysian tree with natives hunting for dinner with blow-darts. She has always been an adventurous one . . .
I’ve commissioned Nicole to take a plethora of pictures, so hopefully we’ll feel as if we were almost there when they return.
That’s all for now, folks. Sorry it’s so short, but we’ve got quite a lot going on between ant invasions, Jewish MUN delegates, and Malaysian explorers. Until later, then.
